Wisdom on Child Rearing; by Arlene Montgomery

{Arlene and Danny Boy}

My dear sweet friend and nanny of ten years passed away unexpectedly last Tuesday, January 22nd 2013. Arlene Montgomery was like a mother to me and a grandmother to my children. She will be deeply missed but I know without a doubt she is at peace in heaven with our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ. Her goal in life was to live a life pleasing to God, and that she did! 

A month ago I asked Mrs. Lean (that’s what the kids and I would call her) if she would do a guest blog post on Seahorse & Stripes. We brainstormed and came up with her writing about her wisdom on child rearing. Arlene raised seven children and has thirteen grandchildren. Arlene would always tell me that her most favorite time in her life was raising her children. I hope you will take away from this some wisdom you can apply in your own home…I know I have.

{Arlene and I at the Boys & Girls Christmas Tree Lane Fundraiser this last Christmas. She was my co-decorator and might I add did a fabulous job!!}

Wisdom on Child Rearing; by Arlene Montgomery

-When your children are young treasure every moment, enjoy them, laugh with them, learn from them and shower them with love. Before you know it, they are grown and on their way to what life holds for them.

-Don’t stress over the insignificant things, keep all things in prospective. React when there is a reason to.

-When there is a strong reason for a parental reaction, sometimes it’s better to remove yourself from the situation for a few minutes and return with a calm demeanor to deal with whatever the problem is. 

{Arlene reading to my children}

-Be consistent in all you do. If there is a disagreement between you and your spouse on how to discipline, resolve differences behind closed doors-never in front of the children.

-Teach your children at a young age respect for their elders (grandparents, teachers, law enforcement, etc.) respect for nature, respect for life in general and most importantly for the creator of all things, God.

-I believe your children will learn more from the example you set before them than the spoken word. 

{Arlene with my children at Mary Ellen's Harvest Party}

-Teenagers can be a challenge but always try to keep the communication flowing. Try to continually build their confidence and hug them even when they seemingly don’t want your hugs (they really do).

-Teach them, most importantly, about actions and consequences. When they are young it’s very hard as a parent to watch them suffer the consequences of their actions but lessons learned at an early age are better than later in life.  We, naturally, want to protect them but that isn’t always possible.

{This is a page from Arlene's family album she had just finished, family was everything to her.}

-If you try to rule with an iron hand sometimes it will come back to bite you. Sometimes they need to hear from you a logical person for what you’re asking for, not just “because I said so.”

-We all have been giving gifts and talents and it’s so important to help your child seek and find them, and most importantly to use them to help others and glorify God.

{Arlene sure loved animals}

-Lastly, and most importantly-LOVE THEM, LOVE THEM, LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALY!

Rest in peace sweet Arlene, you will be deeply missed. I will always love you my friend.